Long day...

This school year has given me a new perspective about our school system... the future generations of America... their parents... and our society. It has pushed me, tested me, and stretched me... forced me to grow... awkwardly... to mature... into an adult with a full time job... who spends long hours agonizing about the things undone... concerned about the broken homes my kids return to after a long day... tired after leaving the classroom after sunset... left with an aching heart...

I cried after school today... this is not uncommon.

This was after I talked to one of the girls in my class who told me she was being teased and picked on by other students at school. I made a long list of students and the bad choices that they make during recess: from gossiping to name-calling... bullying to using inappropriate gestures and spitting at people.

Earlier I had talked with a student who was teased in band. The teacher led the class in a humiliating torrent of taunting "boos" because he said he wanted to quit. He cried about how embarrassing it was. The teacher was reprimanded... and hopefully will learn from this experience and learn to deal with students appropriately.

I returned to my desk where I had been avoiding a "danger hearing" sheet for one of my students.
Student stats: Eleven years old. ADHD. Always does homework. Very supportive grandpa (the ONLY parent helper I have in my class)... unstable divorced parents. Does his best in class. Angers easily. No empathy for others. Low impulse control. Loves video games. Watches Southpark. Called a student that he didn't like a "Jew" and got suspended for three days (I wonder where he got that from... thanks Cartman). That Jewish parent raised hell to the principal even though her son called this student a "dirty Mexican" and didn't get punished for it. Opened the musical instrument case of the same student a few weeks later... got suspended for ANOTHER three days (right before testing) after the parent complained again... principal doesn't like student and is trying to use him to set an example for others. Meanwhile... I had no idea any of this was going on because these things happened during recess and band. My favorite quote: "My mom and dad told me I could hit people when I get angry cause it makes me feel better."

After that, I found out one of my kids moved away over the weekend. I didn't get to say goodbye.
Student stats: Product of a blended home with six below grade level kids. Parents not well educated... they fit the description of "white trash." Also watches South Park and plays video games. Hated reading and school for the first month. Low test scores. Angered easily/short fuse. Made a turn around and worked really hard. Struggled after winter break, but snapped out of it. Had a difficult last month... little did I know his parents were fighting and they decided to get a divorce. Moved across town to further perpetuate the instability that is his life. He had just started to improve again and try harder in school...

Over half of the kids in my class are products of broken homes and divorced parents... you can almost pick out the ones that are. They are missing such fundamental social graces, empathy, anger management, and impulse control. Even the ones who aren't, still treat peers and adults poorly, get upset when forced to follow rules, and think they can talk back and argue to get their way.

I encourage you to visit a contemporary classroom if you are in disbelief.

I called over half of my class today after school from 4:30 - 8:00 pm. Yes, I didn't leave until 8:15 pm. Some calls were made to encourage students to get a good night's rest and a good breakfast for testing tomorrow. I left a lot of messages. But I talked to many parents about the choices their children were making at school.

I reported to one parent that her child won't stop talking back to me and other adults at school. He also flips people off at recess and in other classes. Makes inappropriate comments, talks under his breath, and rolls his eyes when being talked to or disciplined. Then she told me he does the same thing at home and her identity had just been stolen today. They had several thousand dollars of charges made to their account.

I was able to talk to the "Jewish" mother. She has stormed in on my lunch hour without checking in the office to complain about things. She also is proud to declare that she hits her kids, puts soap in their mouths, and yells at them... all the while cussing in front of me. She also told me she is wanted or not allowed in several counties for things she's said and done... hmmm. They are new to the school and have moved A LOT... there are four kids involved in this mess. One in kindergarten, two in fifth grade (one was held back... and ended up in my class because I was the "strict teacher"), and one in eighth grade. She also called to tell me when they first moved that he is the one problem child she has... that I shouldn't trust anything he says because he lies. And then she stands by him and calls to complain about the other student that I talked about earlier because that student is a racist and is picking on him. Double standard? And btw... her other "good children" are always picking on kids and are really aggressive. They are far from a little angels. Favorite quote from this mom: "I don't understand why special ed and ADHD kids are allowed to learn in the same class as smart kids. They should all be forced to live in one county and go to one school..."

Yeah... I was speechless too.

Luckily, God has granted me the words to say and the patience to get me through these difficult and uncomfortable conversations/situations.

This is just a glimpse into my classroom this year. There are so many kids and insane parents I don't even have time or energy to mention. Maybe I'll include some more of them in my next post...